| Phillip
Knox was chiseling a hole into the corner of the basement. The evil
voices had, once again, kept him awake all night long.He couldn't
take it anymore. He had tried everything besides going after the tormenting
demons, and that was the only solution now. At least it was what he
considered to be his last hope of ridding himself from their hellish
ridicule. The demons came one night while Phillip was eating a pastrami
sandwich with cheese. He had just bitten into the sandwich when he
heard someone tell him that he was a bogus dude. He looked about the
kitchen, but none was to be seen. Thinking, perhaps, that the pastrami
|
 |
had
gone straight to his head, he continued feeding when he, once again,
heard a voice. This time, the voice proclaimed that he was a stupid
nobody. "Stop calling me names!", exclaimed Phillip with
a mouthful of bread. "God! Can I get no peace?!! Whomever you
are, you best just leave me alone! Don't pick on me! Leave me alone!"
"Big Dummy!", taunted the voice, "retard!" "God!!!",
Phillip screamed as he spit out the sandwich, threw the rest away,
and stormed out of the kitchen. He flopped his large belly down on
his bead, hugged his pillow and |
| began to weep. He
wasn't afraid of the voice, he was just hurt and knew the things the
voice was telling him might possibly be true. Phillip cried himself
to sleep that night. It was two entire weeks later that the voice
once again began to speak. Phillip had all but forgotten the incident,
blaming a dose of bad pastrami for the encounter. He was staring out
the window at the fat, ugly womanwho lived
next door. The woman was pacing back and forth in her yard ringing
a large bell and chanting something over and over. Phillip strained
his ear to hear what it was that the obese lady was saying, when a
very loud voice screamed in his ear. |
|
"God", Phillip yelled as he covered his ear, "you could've
made me deaf! What's your problem?!!" The lady outside turned
towards Phillip, looked him straight in the eyes, and began chanting
at him. In between each verse, she would clap he hands twice. He couldn't
make out what she was singing until the voice chimed in a sang with
the lady. "Leave...him...alone...(clap clap). Don't...pick...on
him (clap clap). The voice sang along to the mouth movements of the
incredibly overweight woman. The voice liked this tune and continued
singing it repeatedly |
 |
| throughout the night,
driving Phillip crazy. The singing and torture continued constantly
and non-stop for months. At one time, Phillip went to see a Phychic.
The raven-headed soothsayer took one look at Phillip and told him
he was insane. "God!", whined Phillip, "What is wrong
with you people? Cannot anyone see my disenchantment with this whole
affair?!!" And so it was today that Phillip was to finally relieve
himself of the problem that had been plaguing him for what seemed
to be a lifetime. Chisel at the wall he did. Chisel, chisel, chisel
until finally, he dug himself a hole large enough to poke his finger
through. He laid on his large |
 |
tummy and stuck his right eye up to the little tunnel to see if anything
was visible behind the wall. There was no reason why he assumed that
the demons must lie beyond this wall. He just remembered watching
The Amityville Horror, and seeing how those people found a gateway
to hell in their basement, so he figured that must be the place to
start looking. And |
| look he did, until
he saw something coming rapidly towards his eye. It was a finger,
and it poked him in the eye. "God!", screamed Phillip, "you
could've taken my eye out!" Then the voice spoke. "Those
who are silly get a wet willy!", whispered the evil voice from
hell. And with that, the inside of Phillips left ear felt moist and
sticky. "Next time you yelly, you get a redbelly!" promised
the voice. And so Phillip once again ran crying to his bedroom, and
as he passed his life-size pin-up poster of Larry King, he ripped
it from the wall. "I'm not worthy!", he stated as he threw
the poster in the wastebasket. And the voice replied, "No. You're
not. You're barely a man." |
|
